A place for one liners......

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side...PG-13' started by BjornBee, Nov 19, 2009.

  1. Iddee

    Iddee New Member

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    For the festive season remember:


    Alcohol does not make you FAT!

    It makes you LEAN.... ..........................................



    --- against tables, chairs, floors, walls and ugly people.
     
  2. barry42001

    barry42001 New Member

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    If a man is alone in the woods and speaks, and no lady is around to say so--is he still wrong???????????? :confused: :beg:
     

  3. BjornBee

    BjornBee Active Member

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    Depends....Is the lady his wife, girlfriend, or other? :lol:

    Of course if he is alone in the woods, maybe he is digging a hole for his.....ummmmm "Not so talkitive" lady...... :thumbsup:
     
  4. srvfantexasflood

    srvfantexasflood Member

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    This holiday season, remember "You are what you eat, so stay away from the fruit cake".
     
  5. BjornBee

    BjornBee Active Member

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    Oh great! I just finished eating about a pound of nuts..... :lol:
     
  6. srvfantexasflood

    srvfantexasflood Member

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    Same goes from breakfast cereal with fruit, flakes and nuts!
     
  7. BjornBee

    BjornBee Active Member

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    Some must eat a lot of ground round...... :lol:
     
  8. BjornBee

    BjornBee Active Member

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    Politicians and diapers should be changed often - and for the same reason !
     
  9. BjornBee

    BjornBee Active Member

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    A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it.
    The thief was spending less than his wife did
     
  10. BjornBee

    BjornBee Active Member

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    I can't remember the last time I forgot something. :roll:
     
  11. Walt B

    Walt B Active Member

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    I couldn't figure out why the baseball was getting bigger...and then it hit me. :|
     
  12. Iddee

    Iddee New Member

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    If you received a bee suit for your birthday, and wanted to post a pic of you wearing it, would you title it "me in my birthday suit"?
     
  13. Iddee

    Iddee New Member

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    What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?


    10 years and 45 lbs


    What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?


    45 minutes
     
  14. BjornBee

    BjornBee Active Member

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    Why don't Jewish doctors get paid when they circumcise a baby?

    They only take tips....
     
  15. BjornBee

    BjornBee Active Member

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    Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.