Funny?? or Pathetic??

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side...PG-13' started by Iddee, Jul 18, 2010.

  1. Iddee

    Iddee New Member

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    ONE


    Recently, when
    I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you
    could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken
    McNuggets.

    I asked for a half dozen nuggets.


    'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the
    teenager at the counter.

    'You don't?' I
    replied.

    'We only have six, nine, or
    twelve,' was the reply.

    'So I can't order a
    half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?'


    'That's right.'

    So I shook my head and
    ordered six McNuggets

    (Unbelievable but
    sadly true...)



    TWO


    I was checking
    out at the local Walmart with just a few items
    and the lady behind me put her things on the
    belt close to mine. I picked up one of those
    'dividers' that they keep by the cash register
    and placed it between our things so they
    wouldn't get mixed.

    After the girl had
    scanned all of my items, she picked up the
    'divider', looking it all over for the bar code
    so she could scan it.

    Not finding the bar
    code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this
    is?'

    I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I
    don't think I'll buy that today.'

    She said
    'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left.


    She had no clue to what had just happened.




    THREE


    A woman at work was seen
    putting a credit card into her floppy drive and
    pulling it out very quickly.

    When I inquired
    as to what she was doing, she said she was
    shopping on the Internet and they kept asking
    for a credit card number, so she was using the
    ATM 'thingy.'

    (keep
    shuddering!!)


    FOUR

    I recently saw a
    distraught young lady weeping beside her car.
    'Do you need some help?' I asked.

    She
    replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the
    battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I
    can't get into my car. Do you think they
    (pointing to a distant convenience store) would
    have a battery to fit this?'

    'Hmmm, I don't
    know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked.


    'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered,
    handing it and the car keys to me. As I
    took the key and manually unlocked the door, I
    replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and
    check about the batteries. It's a long walk....'


    PLEASE just lay
    down before you hurt yourself !!!


    FIVE

    Several years ago,
    we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day
    she was typing and turned to a secretary and
    said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I
    do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the
    secretary told her. With that, the intern took
    her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it
    on the photocopier and proceeded to make five
    'blank' copies.

    Brunette, by the
    way!!


    SIX


    A mother calls 911 very
    worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to
    take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had
    eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the
    kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the
    mother says, 'I just gave him some ant
    killer......'

    Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to
    emergency!'


    Life is tough.
    It's even tougher if you're
    stupid!!!!
     
  2. G3farms

    G3farms New Member

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    Those are some pretty good ones :lol: :lol:

    Yep you are right ..............if you are going to be stupid, you got to be tough!!
     

  3. Charles

    Charles New Member

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    I think Bill Engvall said it best

    [youtube:2bue7uhh]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5ZkdHImCuQ[/youtube:2bue7uhh]
     
  4. mtnmanky

    mtnmanky New Member

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    "and then they voted....."

    :roll:
     
  5. Ducks®™

    Ducks®™ New Member

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    I always thought the cd player doubled when opened as a Beer holder..I might have ate lead paint but it has no effects on me..":with a neck twitch" I relpy
     
  6. Ducks®™

    Ducks®™ New Member

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    Good one and so right!