OK, Charles, will it pass muster???

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Iddee, Jan 28, 2009.

  1. Iddee

    Iddee New Member

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    A Fairy Tale

    A beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute refugee claimant outside a Maryland immigration office.


    'My good man,' the fairy said, 'I've been told to grant you three wishes, since you just arrived in the United States with your
    wife and three children.'

    The man told the fairy. 'Well, where I come from we don't have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them.'


    The fairy looked at the man's almost toothless grin and -- PING -- he had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth!

    'What else?' asked the fairy, 'two more to go.'


    The refugee claimant now got bolder. 'I need a big house with a three car garage in Annapolis on the water with eight bedrooms for my
    family and the rest of my relatives who still live in my country. I want to bring them all over here.' 'PING ! -


    In the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three-car garage, a long driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ
    in an upscale neighborhood overlooking the bay.


    'One more wish', said the fairy, waving her wand.


    'Yes, one more wish. I want to be like an American with American clothes instead of these torn clothes, and a baseball cap
    instead of this turban. And I want to have white skin like Americans.' 'PING ! - The man was transformed, wearing worn out jeans, a
    Baltimore Orioles T-shirt and a baseball cap. He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon.

    'What happened to my new teeth?' he wailed. 'Where is my new house?'


    The fairy said 'Tough shit, Mac, Now that you are a White American, you have to fend for yourself.'
    ..And she disappeared!
     
  2. Charles

    Charles New Member

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    Haha works fine for me, Here's one back at ya:

    A cowboy, who is visiting Wyoming from Texas, walks into a bar and orders three mugs of Bud. He sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.

    The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, 'You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it. It would taste better if you bought one at a time.' The cowboy replies, 'Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Arizona, the other is in Colorado. When we all left our home in Texas, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together. So I'm drinking one beer for each of my brothers and one for myself.'

    The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.

    The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way. He orders three mugs and drinks them in turn.

    One day, he comes in and only orders two mugs. All the regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, 'I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss.'

    The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eyes and he laughs.

    'Oh, no, everybody's just fine,' he explains, 'It's just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking.'

    'Hasn't affected my brothers though.'
     

  3. dogsoldier13

    dogsoldier13 New Member

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    man its easy to tell its winter in the bee yard :lol: