This year I found the perfect gift for my wife.

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side...PG-13' started by Bens-Bees, Dec 15, 2011.

  1. Bens-Bees

    Bens-Bees New Member

    Messages:
    978
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Yep, this year I found the perfect gift for my wife. I know she's been wanting one, she's been hinting at it all year. From the tone of her voice when she disapprovingly asks if I'm going to mess with the bees instead of cleaning the house every weekend as if to say, "great that you have your thing, now where's mine?" To her disappointment in her birthday present, the lingerie with the note that read "I can't return it, so if it doesn't fit we'll just have to find a neighbor to give it away to", of course the lingerie was 4 sizes too small and we did recently have a 25 year old blonde bombshell move in next door, but I could tell that the real reason she was mad was that she didn't get this gift.

    She's been dreaming about this gift for a long time, I know because sometimes she wakes up in a cold sweat and tells me about it. She also gets so excited when she sees smaller versions of them that she screams, jumps up and down and calls me over just to point it out. She's even seen a psychologist at times to discuss this gift, that's how badly she must have wanted one. I should have given it to her last year, but I didn't and now she's been absolutely miserable to me this past year, but all that's about to change. I know all the nagging will stop and I won't even have to check with her before buying more bee stuff after I get her this gift.

    I learned in grade school that starts out black, but can turn into several different colors, and they come in many different sizes. I'm going to get her a big one, though it'll still fit in a small box. Can you guess what it might be? Yup, a tarantula is the perfect gift for a woman with such clinically severe arachnophobia as my wife has. :twisted:
     
  2. Iddee

    Iddee New Member

    Messages:
    8,996
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    And may you rest in peace.
     

  3. Marbees

    Marbees Member

    Messages:
    983
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    16
    :lol: :lol:
     
  4. PerryBee

    PerryBee New Member

    Messages:
    5,829
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    0
    :lol: :rolling: :rotfl:

    Hilarious Greg!
     
  5. Omie

    Omie New Member

    Messages:
    2,845
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Hey, what's so funny? I used to keep tarantulas, they are GREAT pets, and fascinating too! Sometimes i think about getting another one. Quiet, interesting to watch, colorful, don't smell or shed fur, cheap to feed, no vet bills, don't need walking, take up little space, can be left alone during vacations with no pet sitter....the list goes on and on! :D
     
  6. brooksbeefarm

    brooksbeefarm New Member

    Messages:
    3,276
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    When i was on the Mo. State Water Patrol around Table Rock Lake, i have seen herds (hundreds of them in a bunch) of then crossing the roads. I'm not afraid of them ,but that was spooky :shock: . I agree with iddee, may you RIP :lol: Jack